Endometriosis is hard enough to deal with. You have more pain than anyone should have to go through. There is stress on your body, mind, and relationships. Working can be almost impossible. Yet, people still feel the need to open their mouths and offer advice – most of it you don’t really want. So here is the second part of things that have been said to an endo warrior. You will want to facepalm just reading them!
1. You should try doing yoga!
This may be shocking to some, but doing yoga is not going to cure endometriosis. No matter how much you move or how you focus, the pain isn’t going to simply vanish. Most endo warriors have done everything that they can to deal with the pain. Endo is a real condition. Exercise, movement, and yoga are simply not the cure to make it better, in fact, there are some days when moving is simply not an option.
2. Have you considered having children?
There’s a common misconception that having children cures endometriosis. This is false. Just as bad is when someone says, Why don’t you just get a hysterectomy?? Not only is this not a cure, but why would you even say that to anyone? This was said to a 20-year-old endo warrior. They even suggested that perhaps going through the surgery would be worth it – even if it meant she could never have children. Our endo warrior responded with “Endo has taken away so much of my life, why not let it take my future too?!”
3. Oh yeah, my cousin’s sister’s friend from high school had that and she was fine.
Endometriosis affects every single person differently. There is no one that has the exact same pain as another endo warrior. In fact, the same person may be able to feel fine one day and be unable to get out of bed the next. Don’t compare our pain or pain management with anyone else’s.
Even if you have endo, it doesn’t give you the right to tell me that I shouldn’t feel the way that I feel.
4. I have bad period cramps, too.
Endometriosis is not just bad period cramps. There is so much more to the pain than that. Please don’t tell me to just get over it or that you feel I am overreacting. Comparing my pain to your pain is never okay. You don’t understand if you don’t have an endo. Endo is not just a bad period. Our endo warriors don’t want to hear how bad your pain is. Nor do they want to hear how light and easy your period is. Everyone is doing the best that they can with the body they have.
5. You should try…..
Insert anything here. Everyone has something whether it is a drink, a diet plan, or a supplement. We know you want to help but: just so you know, there is currently no cure for endometriosis. Guess what, Tylenol doesn’t always work. Endo warriors have been told to do everything from drinking more water to taking CBD. Surprisingly, we know how to care for our bodies.
8. It could be worse.
Sure. But guess what? It could also be better. There are days that our endo warriors can’t deal with anymore. They hurt so bad they can’t move. Saying it can’t be worse is simply not something that you should say to anyone about anything. At that moment, there is nothing worse. Endo is life-altering pain.
9. At least you don’t have cancer.
Not sure how this is supposed to make someone feel better. Everyone has their own story and their own life. Sure, some things are worse than endo but endo is worse than some things too.
10. If you had a more positive attitude you’d probably feel better.
So basically, you are telling an endo warrior who is dealing with constant pain that it is there fault for being sick? I may not look sick, but that doesn’t mean that I am feeling great. There really isn’t any reason for anyone to say this to another human.
Endo Warriors are some of the strongest people there are. They deal with the pain of endo daily. They deal with treatment options that forces them to put their life on hold. They deal with surgeries – it is never just one. They face the hard choice of treatment options. Their future and the future of their family is also always on their mind. A little bit of praise could go a long way. Most endo warriors understand that you mean well. They know that you just want to help. Most of the time, you don’t mean to be hateful or rude. If you want to help, be supportive. Help them to understand that you will be there for them. Visit with them. Listen to them rant. All most endo warriors want is a little bit of patience and understanding. Just remember to try to stay away from these face-palming comments.